The Shark, meanwhile, went 0 for 4, but clearly had a lot on his mind. According to some, the world was supposed to end today. Despite the fact that Roger Bernadina had a game to play, he wasn't going to let that happen. Between every half inning, Bernadina was seen hurriedly exiting the clubhouse to prevent several world disasters.
- Between the 1st and the 2nd, he swam to the center of the earth, and pulled two slipping tectonic plates back together
- During the 4th inning, he threw a whale at a fast approaching meteor in order to throw it off its collision course with earth.
- In the 5th, the Shark swallowed trillions of gallons of water, preventing a flood in the Ukraine
- While fans sang "Take Me Out to the Ball Game" during the 7th inning stretch, Bernadina stole all nuclear capabilities from North Korea.
- Finally, just before the top of the 9th, the Shark tossed a bunch of Phillies fans into a pit.
More to come.